Valentine’s Day in the Style of Aquinas

Article 1. Whether Kristi should be Shane’s Valentine?

Objection 1. It seems that Shane is not good looking enough to be Kristi’s Valentine.

Objection 2. Further, Shane is not good enough for Kristi.

Objection 3. Further, it does not seem possible that Shane could change to be good enough for Kristi.

On the contrary, It is written, “I will be your Valentine” (Hallmark card).

I answer that, It is absolutely true that Kristi should be Shane’s Valentine; and this can be shown in three ways.

First, because Kristi is filled with compassion, and as we have previously shown, compassion for another person’s misery drives us to do what we can to help him, which in Kristi’s case is to be Shane’s Valentine.

Secondly, because Kristi is a virtuous woman, and the highest of virtues is charity, and such a case is Shane.

Thirdly, because as stated above, Love belongs to the appetitive power, and Shane has a powerful appetite; therefore, Kristi’s love belongs to Shane.

Reply to Objection 1. As the Philosopher says, bodily sight is the beginning of sensual love, but Kristi’s eyesight is impaired, and so Shane’s appearance is not an obstacle to her affections.

Reply to Objection 2. Goodness is convertible with truth, and Shane is truthful enough for Kristi; therefore Shane is good enough for Kristi.

Reply to Objection 3. Change is nothing more than the actualization of a potential. Now since that which moves must be moved by another, Kristi can move Shane and reduce his potencies to act. As Augustine has said, Kristi really knows how to “actualize a potential.”

2 Comments

  1. Awesome. It’s funny because it’s true!

  2. Way funny!

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